Orange Soda and Banana Moon Pies

I have decided to change the look of my blog for awhile.  I'm sure I will change it again a little ways down the road (I get bored quickly with the look of things. I like frequent change.)  I realize the new look is slightly gloomy, but, to me, there is something beautiful and simple about it.

I wanted to thank all of those who read my blog from time to time.  It's neat to see that there are people who are actually interested (even if only slightly, or out of boredom) in what is on this mind of mine.

Today has been a lazy day, along with yesterday.  I only left the house once (to my knowledge), and that was to go on a date with my wonderful husband to see the movie "What to Expect When You're Expecting."  Very funny movie by the way, even if there were a few parts that had me inconspicuously wiping my eyes.

I have drown my laziness in orange soda and banana moon pies.  Which might explain the slight bit of nausea I have felt -- too much sugar, and not enough of anything else.

I will stop babbling for now.  Until I find more to say.  My brain feels like mush, and is currently lacking in the creativity department.

So long for now!  I hope everyone has a wonderful week!

Joyous Laughter

This evening, our home was filled with the joyous sound of laughter.  Both from my husband, Ryan, and I along with our son Liam.  Ryan enjoys playing with Liam in any way he can that will get him to giggle or chuckle.  Most of the time he is satisfied with a small laugh, but strives for the belly laughs. :)

One particular moment, in which we both wish we could have captured with the camera in time, was when Ryan walked into Liam's room to find him in a very interesting position.  With his head on the mattress, Liam had somehow gotten his legs up in the air, with his tummy up against the rails, and was doing a headstand (with his neck) on the side of the crib!  All while playfully screaming. You can imagine the laughter that followed!  How does a 4 and a half month old get into such a predicament??!!  He didn't seem to mind though, but rest assured that I was concerned enough about him injuring himself that I made Ryan quickly move him before he could even get his camera out to take a picture.

The other instances in which we were filled with joy and laughter are just all of the little things that little one's do, but because he is our child, we found them to be the funniest things on earth.  One if these things was the release of a bodily function that just so happened to have been done in a hilarious way (unbeknownst to the little person who did it).  :)

I cherish these moments, and never want to wish them away.

Sniffles, giggles, and laughter.

Sniffles, gags, sneezes, and coughs are parading around our house these days.  The newest addition to our family (he's only been with us for 19 weeks and 3 days - or 4 and a half months, whichever you prefer) is the leader of this parade.  I have spent more time checking to see if he is still breathing than I have been anything else.  It's not a fun feeling.  I get so worried that in the middle of the night, his little nose will be stopped up, and he will have so much drainage in his throat that he will get choked and not be able to breathe.

On a lighter note, I am enjoying watching our little one learn new things.  He is becoming a master at holding things with his hands, and reaching out to grab things.  His form of transportation has long been rolling around from place to place.  And we get all the babbles, coos, giggles, and chuckles we could ever ask for.  I love listening to him talk to himself while I'm busy doing something else.  It sure does make this momma's heart swell.

Pretty soon we are going to have to figure out a method of keeping this crazy boy contained in one location.  The more mobile he becomes, the more I realize just how crazy life is going to get once he is 100% mobile!  I guess that's what they make play pens for - to have a safe place to confine your small child to so they aren't getting into everything every five seconds!

I'm just praying for the dogs, and the day they will no longer be able to mind their own business.  The day when their ears and tails become new toys, and they enter into an eternal game of tag, in which they are never "it".  I foresee many pictures, videos, and laughs to come.

Unconditional

Life as of late has been a new adventure. I am learning how to be a mother. I am learning how to balance being a wife and being a mother at the same time. I am learning how to take control when things get out of control (a.k.a.-every possible area on a child that could expel anything, does. LOL) Most of all, I am learning how to have unconditional love.

For me, unconditional love is hard to give. I get angry when people don't follow the rules of the road. I get angry when people treat others unfairly. And the list goes on. So, for me, to show someone love, no matter what they say or do, is not something that comes naturally. However, loving my child unconditionally, so far, has proven to be the easiest thing on earth. There is nothing that compares to the love you have for your child. There is something magical about it. Maybe it has to do with the fact that a single human being (or 2 or 20, depending on how many children you have) possesses both yourself and the one person on earth who is your best friend, your soul mate, the source of your passion, etc.) Two people, combined together to create one person. It's phenomenal. My minuscule little mind cannot always grasp this concept. All I know is, I love my child like I have never loved anyone before. In fact, I have to be cautious that I do not put him above my husband (but that is another topic for another day). 


 Loving my son comes naturally. It's easy. And for now, he loves me back. It's easy to have unconditional love for someone like this. It's easy to love someone who loves you in return. But how easy is it to love someone who hates you? Not very. Well let's not even go that far with it. Let's just ask ourselves: how easy is it to love someone you don't know? Still the answer is the same. Not very. 


Something my child is helping me learn, is how to do this. How to love someone when they don't love you back. How to even love someone who is unlovable. If I can have this kind of love for my child, then I know I am capable. Because the truth is, my child is not perfect. Even at this young age he messes up. He spits up on my nice outfit. He screams when everyone is being quiet. And although these are small things in comparison to the larger things we have to encounter with others, it's a small step in the direction of learning.  


I thank the God I serve for this blessing in my life. I pray I never take him for granted. He is a gift. And I love him. Unconditionally.

Trusting Him With All We Have

Here lately I have been down in the dumps. Down about our humble home, down about money, down about my family having to wear the same few outfits over and over again. Down about a lot of things.

Thankfully God heard my heart's cry, and ordained my next reading in "Crazy Love" to be about this very topic. Only, Francis Chan was not writing about my pity party and how to console these feelings; he was writing about how we need to trust God to take care of us with little. That we need to give God more, and trust that He is going to take care of our needs.

In Deuteronomy 15:10, God tells us to give liberally and to do so in an ungrudging manner. And I started thinking about how much I try to hoard what little we have, in hopes that we will actually have something, and every time I am disappointed when the cup runs dry. But I see where I went wrong. I was under the impression that my life is about gaining more things, gaining a bigger and nicer house that we actually own and not rent, being able to eat out at restaurants, having nice new clothes for every season, etc. But I am quickly seeing my fault. My life is not about THINGS. My life is about serving the One Who gave His life for all mankind. My life is about giving everything I have to His work. My life is about serving OTHERS, not myself. How can I serve others when all I am thinking about is how I can scrounge up enough money to buy a new outfit?? I can't!

My attitude has been completely altered by this society and the message it sends. According to society: Life is all about the "American Dream". Life is all about gaining success. But what is success, really? I am finding myself asking this question more and more.

Jesus teaches us the real success in life. All we have to do is seek Him, and He will reveal it to us. Do you dare to trust Him today, with everything you have?

What The World Thinks

The Bible tells us there is POWER in the name of Jesus.

I always understood this, but just recently, that has taken on a very new meaning.

How ironic is it that people in this world who want NOTHING to do with God, will say things like, "Jesus says not to judge", or "Jesus says to love everybody."
I bet these people don't even realize by saying this, they have just given AUTHORITY to Jesus. They have just unknowingly stated that they think there is credibility in the words of Christ! How exciting is that?! If they are willing to to think there is weight behind those couple of things that Jesus said, then maybe they are willing to hear the rest of the story?!

There is AUTHORITY, and POWER in the name of JESUS CHRIST!!

Get Up and Get Moving

I have been sort down in the dumps the past two months. Down in the dumps about my body. I have struggled this entire pregnancy with changes my body has endured. And now that this child is no longer renting out space in my abdomen, I am still struggling with the image I see staring back at me in the mirror. I hate when I see people for the first time since the baby has been born and I see there eyes glance toward my postpartum tummy.

I realize I just had my son only eight and a half short weeks ago - and I realize I'm going to look like I just had a child. But the truth is, I was hoping I would be one of the small percentage of people who can leave the hospital in their pre-pregnancy jeans. Truth is, I am not one of those people. But my next thought was, I can use nursing to my advantage - effortless calorie burning! Unfortunately, nursing was not possible for us.

So here I am, two months later, and still looking five or six months pregnant. Ryan and I have started trying to power walk almost every night. I also have been trying to watch my calories; but that's not enough. My weight hasn't budged.

First of all, let me just say, calorie counting is very difficult. I am not one of those people who can see that I've reached my limit for the day (even though it's only 2 o'clock in the afternoon) and then simply not anything until the next day. I have a horrible case of the munchies - and I don't even do drugs! I just LOVE food. I am IN LOVE with food. I love the smell, the taste... everything.

This is a large problem. Especially when every kind of food made available to Americans has enough calories to equal virtually my ENTIRE caloric intake for ONE day. And then, to buy healthy foods, one must be a millionaire.

So what is a person to do? I haven't gotten it all figured out just yet. I am, however, determined to feel better about myself. I don't need to look like a supermodel. And I don't need to be a size zero. Those things are unrealistic. I want goals that are actually achievable.

I have realized about myself that when I set the bar too high, I tend to give up more quickly. So I am going to work my way up to where I would like to be. For now, I will start small.

So here are my goals for this week:

1) Don't worry about having an elaborate workout routine just yet - just focus on getting up off the couch and GET MOVING!

2) DRINK MORE WATER!

Letting Go

Sometimes letting go of things we want to be in control of is one of the hardest things we can do. Why is it so painful to give these things, that have planted seeds of ugly bitterness in our souls, over to the One who heals all wounds?

I wonder why we try so hard to hold on to these things that create darkness in our hearts? Why does it seem better to continue to be bitter, and angry?

Let go of these things. The Master of all things living and dead will heal you. He will repair your broken heart. He will cleanse your infected soul.

Hopelessly, Ridiculously, Passionately....

I have recently started reading "No Compromise" by Melody Green, the story of Keith Green's life journey. It has gotten me thinking about what is really important in life. Granted, I am still in the beginning of the book where Keith is still searching for answers to his spiritual longings. But something about his life not long before he died is what keeps sticking out to me. I didn't know the man personally, but I know his music. So much of his heart is in the lyrics to his songs. Never have I been so convicted while listening to music as I have while listening to any one of the songs written by Keith Green. He was a man very obviously longing after God's own heart, and very obviously distressed with the Christian world around him. And rightly so.

As I continue to find myself being distressed with things I see in this world also, I pray that distress never goes away. The moment I find myself being okay with everything I see going on around me is the moment I have forgotten everything that is of importance in life. I don't want to be the majority. I want to stand out. I want to be hopelessly, ridiculously, and passionately in love with the man who is God, Jesus Christ. My hope is for everyone else in this world to find that same hopeless, ridiculous, passionate love, with the man who is God, as well. If only they could experience Him the way He intended them to.

Where Do Our Passions Lie?

According to some, I am very "passionate" about certain things in life. According to others, I may simply come across as rude and harsh rather than "passionate". One thing that really bothers me is how passionate people are about sports. I have been told it is highly rude of me to speak about my frustration on this topic since many families really enjoy sports and it might come across poorly for me to say how I truly feel about this topic. But others could argue the same about my own passions in life. Granted, I'm not passionate about sports, but I am definitely passionate about a great many things. I'm passionate about trying to help people to see how wrong abortion is, and the fact that it is murder. I am passionate about the typical Christian's lack of concern for others around them, including the homeless and hungry we see on a daily basis. I am passionate about the fact that it is very disheartening for people to call themselves Christians, and then not act like a Christian. This list could go on forever.

Aside from all of those passions, I would say the thing that I'm passionate about that would make me most like a sports fan is photography. Granted I'm not near as passionate as some, just as not all sports fans are as passionate as others. But regardless, there are similarities there. I have no right to get frustrated with people who seem to be more concerned with and involved in sports than they do the dying soul of a person going to hell. For I am no better than they.

It should not matter to me what people are passionate about, it should only matter to me that they are being MORE passionate about Christ and His great commandment for our lives.

Are we (myself included) really and truly giving the majority of our attention to the life we have after this one, and making sure we spread this news to others? Or are we spending the majority of our time enjoying the temporary pleasures of this world?

Home Stretch

If you had asked me a few month ago how pregnancy was going, I might have told you it was going very slowly, and it felt like this little guy growing in my tummy would never get here. Today, however, I am 30 weeks and 1 day! I am astonished at how quickly these past several month have flown by. I am now at the point of panic, when I realize this baby could literally come at ANY time (hopefully he keeps baking for about another 8 to 10 weeks). I believe I understand where the urge to "nest" comes from. For me, it's in the panicked state of realizing our home is not "baby-ready" and knowing that I need to hurry to get everything perfect for our little one's arrival. I look around and see clutter, dust, and the lack of a finished nursery. These things are putting me into a state of frenzy.

Up until this point I rarely felt up to the task of getting the baby's things in order, or getting his room ready for all of his belongings. But now I am realizing I have stuff with nowhere to put it! I know it will all get done eventually, but I can't help feeling as though it needs to be completed sooner rather than later.

As I look ahead to the coming weeks, I am thoroughly looking forward to getting closer to meeting our little guy face to face. I never understood the love people talked about that was between a mother and her child until these past 30 weeks. It is amazing how overwhelming of a love it truly is - and I can only imagine how much more overwhelming it will be when I hold my son in my arms for the first time.

I feel so blessed to be given such a miracle. And I feel equally as blessed to be able to share this miracle with the man God has given me.

Weight A Minute

I have been debating whether or not to write this blog at all, but have recently been struggling with this issue and am strongly feeling the need to get this all out there. This may or may not sound abrasive and/or blunt, but I feel the need to get it off my chest (probably due to raging pregnancy hormones).



Throughout my life I have had to deal with people criticizing my weight. When I was a teenager I was thin, just like the majority of teenage girls. However, I was always told I looked anorexic and needed to gain weight (even though I was within the medically determined healthy weight range for my gender, age, and height). Even though being told you look anorexic may not sound like an insult, it always felt like one. The effect it had was the same feeling as being told you look ugly. To have some part of your body, no matter which part that may be, consistently criticized made me feel inadequate. I wasn't good enough the way I was, I needed to change to be acceptable in people's eyes.

Once I got married and starting putting on "happy weight", I started being told I looked much better having more meat on my bones. At this point, I was not happy with myself. I didn't want to gain "happy weight". I wanted to stay fit. But again, I struggled with the feeling that I needed to change in order to be beautiful to others.

Now, I am at the beginning of my third trimester in my first pregnancy. I was warned that people make comments about how big you are getting when you are pregnant, but I was not mentally or emotionally prepared for how it would actually feel to have your weight constantly noted by others. I'm not sure if people realize the impact their words have on another's self esteem. Even if I am pregnant, telling me I'm "getting big" isn't going to make me feel happy, it is only going to make me feel more self conscious about the changes my body is going through.

Why do people find it necessary to make verbal note of another person's weight or appearance? As if girls and women don't have enough to worry about with all the movies, television, and magazines making them feel like they need to live up to a certain beauty standard, having people always point out flaws (even if they don't mean to make it sound like a flaw) makes feeling inadequate even worse. This type of thing makes people feel the need to search out a way to make themselves acceptable in the public eye. And if they are unable to achieve a standard for "beauty", they will then feel as though they are less beautiful than others.

My point in writing all of this is to make people aware of how their words can be hurtful to others. I am only one of MANY girls and women who have fallen victim of being forever judged by their appearance. A word of encouragement to those who do the judging. Before you speak your mind about someone else's appearance, DON'T! You may think what you are saying is not hurtful to their feelings, but most likely, like me, they have learned to hide the fact that they have been hurt by someone's words. In fact, any time you can avoid making ANY kind of comment about another person's weight or appearance, take that opportunity to simply compliment them instead.

Have Some Compassion!

It's amazing the way your heartstrings can be tugged on when you start thinking about all the horrible things going on in the world. The old saying, "Out of sight, out of mind" is true. If I am not seeing pictures of other countries, and the starving children and adults, I don't always think about it. But thankfully I am given constant reminders of the people who are in need.

The thing that always goes through my mind is that I so desperately want to help, but sometimes I just don't know how. I am also thankful that I am surrounded with avenues that will point me in the right direction for being able to help these dying, hurting multitudes.

There have been times when I feel as if I am the only person in the world who cares enough to want to make a difference. But I am glad to have wonderful people in my life that I know have some of the same concerns about the world as I do.

This morning my heart strings have again been tugged on. My ears hear t
he silent screams. And my soul cries for all of the unseen tears that are shed.

If you want to know more, or just read about other people who want to make a difference in the world, I encourage you to check out www.compassionscryblog.com!

A Not-So-Random Act of Kindness

As I sit and read the sea of facebook statuses, I can't help but wondering what I have become. I also begin to wonder what our world has become. I read status after depressing status. I find myself getting most frustrated at the way people in the world think, and their take on life. I am beginning to feel I have better things to do with my time, than to get heated over statuses and comments that are created for the simple purpose of getting a rise out of others. I read things about people having the worst day, week, month, etc of their entire lives, and wonder if they have stepped outside of their house to take a look around at the people surrounding them. Their are so many people hurting. There are so many people battling diseases. There are so many people who have had worse things happen to them in one day than dropping their phone in the toilet, getting a ticket, or simply having things not go their way. I find myself even questioning the things I get frustrated about.

I wonder about the cause of all of this, and I am left sitting here with one thought: selfishness.

There are few people in this world anymore than are truly selfless. Most people today are only concerned with themselves. They only care about making themselves happy. They only want to do what benefits them. They could care less about the people around them. They could care less about the cashier at Dollar General and if she is having a good day or not. I wonder if things would start to change if everyone were to strive to care more about others than themselves. Even if it only started with one person being selfless. Would this act of kindness carry from one person to the next? I find that it is not easy for someone to be rude to you if you are genuinely kind to them. Sometimes they are still able to be rude, but most of the time, your kindness calms their manner. Maybe that simple act of kindness will brighten their whole day, and in turn, they will end up being kind to other people they see after you... and so on.

This is the question I am asking myself as of late: What kind of difference could I make in people's lives by simply being kind, and thinking of them first, rather than myself?

Cellphone Fever

Today I went to the Cellphone store to look at my options for my coming upgrade. I have always gotten overwhelmed while browsing the cellphones on display, but it seemed to be worse this time. I noticed that there once was a time when they had a cellphone designed to fit just about any personality. But now it seems they all have one purpose in mind... to be the best selling. I also noticed that while they all seem to be competing with each other, they have also taken on a new appearance. The new fangled "outfits" these phones are wearing no longer appeal to individuals. They instead look like a row of drones. All created for one purpose, all doing the same thing, all looking exactly the same. So how is someone like me, who seeks creativity supposed to pick a new phone when they all appear to be the exact same? I have not quite figured out the answer to this question. However, there is a part of me that wishes I could just go back to the day when things were more simple. All you needed was a call button and an end button. I have a feeling this is not going to happen. Although, I wouldn't mind trying to simplify things.

Shopping for Weight Gain

I did not realize how quickly clothes can become too small when you are growing a human being inside of you. It is a very depressing thought to need to go shopping for LARGER clothes because the ones you have are much too small. Normally, clothes shopping sounds like a great time of fun, but not today. Not when I have to move to a different section of the store, one in which I have not yet navigated...
Nevertheless, I am about to head out on a small scale shopping spree (VERY small scale) to purchase clothing that will help me not feel so much like the beached whale that I feel like.

Couponing: Round 2 for the day = Improvement!

So, as some of you may have read, earlier this morning I had my first couponing outing at Publix, and did decently well for my first time. However, I was not fully satisfied with my outcome. I was happy, yes, but not fully satisfied. I felt I could do better... and I DID!

First of all, everyone needs to go to CVS and get an "extra care" card. It's sort of like getting free money. That's the only way I know how to explain it.

With my ECB card (extra care bucks card) I started out saving a little on two bottles of Nivea body wash, and a gallon of milk.
Nivea (with card) was $3.88 per bottle.
The milk was $3.19

I had (2) $3.00 coupons for Nivea Body wash
OOP: 2.35 for (2) Nivea Bodywash, after tax. ($1.16 each after tax)

I had (1) $1.00 coupon for the milk.
OOP: $1.19 (I am assuming the rest of the money deducted from the price of the milk came from the ECB card.... but the receipt is confusing to me, and I can't figure it out.)

At Publix I bought (2) 4-packs of YoPlus Yogurt $2.00 each.
Publix already had them on sale, BOGO
I then used (2) $1.00 coupons, (1) toward each 4-pack and VIOLA!
OOP: FREE!!!

Grocery List:
1 Gallon of Milk
2 Nivea Body Wash 16.9oz
2 4-pack YoPlus Yogurt
Total: $3.54

First "Extreme" Coupon Experience

Today I made my first attempt at Extreme Couponing! I will have to say, I will need a lot of practice! I did not do as well as I had hoped, but I did do well enough to keep me motivated!

Yesterday I went and bought TWO Sunday papers, took out all the coupons, and put them into three main categories: "Health & Beauty," "Paper Goods & Household," and "Food & Dog." According to what I have heard, I need to wait about five weeks before I touch the coupons, BUT I got a little excited and tried to find a couple of deals to start me off.

I started with two items from Publix.
Ritz Crackerfuls
Publix had them on sale BOGO
I then added (2) Manufacturer coupons each for $1 off. I was able to apply one coupon for each box. Lucky for me, the second box was already free, making the second coupon go towards the price of the first box!
Retail: (2) Crackerfuls = $3.49 ea. ($6.98)
Publix Promotion: BOGO = (2) Crackerfuls @ $3.49
(2) MFR Coupons, $1 off ea. = $2 off total
Out of Pocket (OOP): $1.49 for (2) Crackerfuls = $0.75 ea.

Same process for Orville Redenbocker Popcorn
(2) Orville Redenbocker =$9.78
Publix Promotion: BOGO. Leaving total @ (2) Orville Redenbocker for $4.89
(2) MFR Coupons, ea. coupon for $0.55 off one box. =$1.10 off total
OOP: $3.79 for (2) Orville Redenbocker = $1.90 ea.

Total OOP spent: $5.28
Total savings: $11.48 !!

Sorry if that was confusing, but basically the crackers and the popcorn were already Buy One Get One (BOGO), and I had one coupon per item purchased (totaling 4 coupons), meaning I was putting TWO coupons towards ONE item, since the second item is already free. Meaning, more savings for me!!

Until next time! Happy Saving! :)

Becoming a Coupon Queen

While enjoying a visit from my in-laws, I was having a conversation with Ryan's mom about couponing. I informed her that any time I have ever tried to use coupon's in the past, the store brand is always cheaper than the name brand item even with the coupon.
She was telling me that doing couponing that way will not save you money at all. If you coupon correctly, you can get a lot of items for a lot less than the originally price, if not free, and OCCASIONALLY even make money off and item. Although, some stores will not pay you the owed money, they will just leave your balance at zero. But STILL, ZERO dollars for a cart full of groceries is AWESOME!

Here are a few tips to help you in being a beginner couponer.
1)Go to southernsavers.com AND/OR the krazycouponlady.com
2)Read everything you can on the basics to becoming a couponer.
3)Don't try to become and EXTREME couponer to start with, start with ONE STORE to do all your couponing at.
4)Chose a store that seems more expensive the rest of the time, rather than a store that seems cheaper all of the time. (Publix, Kroger, Sweetbay, etc. are good choices.)
5)Get into the habit of picking up MORE THAN ONE paper with coupons, or coupon catalogue.


Feel free to join me on this new adventure! Also, don't hesitate to comment on any frustrations, or tips!

How Dare I?

There is something truly painful about feeling like you have developed a deadly disease in which people wish not to speak to you, nor look at you, nor acknowledge your existence. I can't say I know what a leper feels like, but I can say I know what it feels like to feel disowned. I know what it feels like to be treated like I don't exist. I know what it feels like to have people who you were once close to treat you as though you have never met, and they do not desire to speak to you or know you. Is this what a homeless person standing on the street corner feels like? Do they feel invisible to the world? Do they feel as though death is radiating from their skin, and everyone passing by is too afraid of catching death to even glance in their direction? Do they feel as though their voice is unheard when they speak out loud in a crowd of people?
I do not wish to say I know how someone else feels, but I wish to say I know similar feelings, if not quite to that degree. And I started out writing this blog to help release the feelings of hurt in my heart from all these emotions... and yet, here I am, realizing I have no right to complain. I have no right to feel sorry for myself. I am disgusted with myself even, for ever having treated someone in such ways as I have just described. My heart is broken for the many people I have walked by without a second glance as though they were not even there. I am ashamed of the many people standing on the corner asking for food that I came upon and chose to look the other way. What have I become? What have WE become? We are such a hateful, selfish world. My heart is broken because of the person I have been. How dare I stand before THE GOD who created everything and everyone and tell him I just didn't feel like giving away twenty dollars to someone who may not have had a warm meal that night, or a warm bed. How dare I ask God for more when I can't even share what He has already given me? How dare I ask God to mend my heart, when I can't even remember to ask Him to mend people's souls? How dare I ask God to help me to have a good day, when I haven't ask Him to use me to save a dying world? How dare I ask God to bless my food, when I am too greedy and stingy to share it with a hungry man living under the bridge?
My heart is broken for the things I done, or HAVEN'T done.... but I feel Christ stirring me to be better. I feel Him molding me to look more like Him. It is a painful, sad, and yet beautiful process. I pray that He never stops molding me into what He wants me to be.