Home Stretch

If you had asked me a few month ago how pregnancy was going, I might have told you it was going very slowly, and it felt like this little guy growing in my tummy would never get here. Today, however, I am 30 weeks and 1 day! I am astonished at how quickly these past several month have flown by. I am now at the point of panic, when I realize this baby could literally come at ANY time (hopefully he keeps baking for about another 8 to 10 weeks). I believe I understand where the urge to "nest" comes from. For me, it's in the panicked state of realizing our home is not "baby-ready" and knowing that I need to hurry to get everything perfect for our little one's arrival. I look around and see clutter, dust, and the lack of a finished nursery. These things are putting me into a state of frenzy.

Up until this point I rarely felt up to the task of getting the baby's things in order, or getting his room ready for all of his belongings. But now I am realizing I have stuff with nowhere to put it! I know it will all get done eventually, but I can't help feeling as though it needs to be completed sooner rather than later.

As I look ahead to the coming weeks, I am thoroughly looking forward to getting closer to meeting our little guy face to face. I never understood the love people talked about that was between a mother and her child until these past 30 weeks. It is amazing how overwhelming of a love it truly is - and I can only imagine how much more overwhelming it will be when I hold my son in my arms for the first time.

I feel so blessed to be given such a miracle. And I feel equally as blessed to be able to share this miracle with the man God has given me.

Weight A Minute

I have been debating whether or not to write this blog at all, but have recently been struggling with this issue and am strongly feeling the need to get this all out there. This may or may not sound abrasive and/or blunt, but I feel the need to get it off my chest (probably due to raging pregnancy hormones).



Throughout my life I have had to deal with people criticizing my weight. When I was a teenager I was thin, just like the majority of teenage girls. However, I was always told I looked anorexic and needed to gain weight (even though I was within the medically determined healthy weight range for my gender, age, and height). Even though being told you look anorexic may not sound like an insult, it always felt like one. The effect it had was the same feeling as being told you look ugly. To have some part of your body, no matter which part that may be, consistently criticized made me feel inadequate. I wasn't good enough the way I was, I needed to change to be acceptable in people's eyes.

Once I got married and starting putting on "happy weight", I started being told I looked much better having more meat on my bones. At this point, I was not happy with myself. I didn't want to gain "happy weight". I wanted to stay fit. But again, I struggled with the feeling that I needed to change in order to be beautiful to others.

Now, I am at the beginning of my third trimester in my first pregnancy. I was warned that people make comments about how big you are getting when you are pregnant, but I was not mentally or emotionally prepared for how it would actually feel to have your weight constantly noted by others. I'm not sure if people realize the impact their words have on another's self esteem. Even if I am pregnant, telling me I'm "getting big" isn't going to make me feel happy, it is only going to make me feel more self conscious about the changes my body is going through.

Why do people find it necessary to make verbal note of another person's weight or appearance? As if girls and women don't have enough to worry about with all the movies, television, and magazines making them feel like they need to live up to a certain beauty standard, having people always point out flaws (even if they don't mean to make it sound like a flaw) makes feeling inadequate even worse. This type of thing makes people feel the need to search out a way to make themselves acceptable in the public eye. And if they are unable to achieve a standard for "beauty", they will then feel as though they are less beautiful than others.

My point in writing all of this is to make people aware of how their words can be hurtful to others. I am only one of MANY girls and women who have fallen victim of being forever judged by their appearance. A word of encouragement to those who do the judging. Before you speak your mind about someone else's appearance, DON'T! You may think what you are saying is not hurtful to their feelings, but most likely, like me, they have learned to hide the fact that they have been hurt by someone's words. In fact, any time you can avoid making ANY kind of comment about another person's weight or appearance, take that opportunity to simply compliment them instead.

Have Some Compassion!

It's amazing the way your heartstrings can be tugged on when you start thinking about all the horrible things going on in the world. The old saying, "Out of sight, out of mind" is true. If I am not seeing pictures of other countries, and the starving children and adults, I don't always think about it. But thankfully I am given constant reminders of the people who are in need.

The thing that always goes through my mind is that I so desperately want to help, but sometimes I just don't know how. I am also thankful that I am surrounded with avenues that will point me in the right direction for being able to help these dying, hurting multitudes.

There have been times when I feel as if I am the only person in the world who cares enough to want to make a difference. But I am glad to have wonderful people in my life that I know have some of the same concerns about the world as I do.

This morning my heart strings have again been tugged on. My ears hear t
he silent screams. And my soul cries for all of the unseen tears that are shed.

If you want to know more, or just read about other people who want to make a difference in the world, I encourage you to check out www.compassionscryblog.com!

A Not-So-Random Act of Kindness

As I sit and read the sea of facebook statuses, I can't help but wondering what I have become. I also begin to wonder what our world has become. I read status after depressing status. I find myself getting most frustrated at the way people in the world think, and their take on life. I am beginning to feel I have better things to do with my time, than to get heated over statuses and comments that are created for the simple purpose of getting a rise out of others. I read things about people having the worst day, week, month, etc of their entire lives, and wonder if they have stepped outside of their house to take a look around at the people surrounding them. Their are so many people hurting. There are so many people battling diseases. There are so many people who have had worse things happen to them in one day than dropping their phone in the toilet, getting a ticket, or simply having things not go their way. I find myself even questioning the things I get frustrated about.

I wonder about the cause of all of this, and I am left sitting here with one thought: selfishness.

There are few people in this world anymore than are truly selfless. Most people today are only concerned with themselves. They only care about making themselves happy. They only want to do what benefits them. They could care less about the people around them. They could care less about the cashier at Dollar General and if she is having a good day or not. I wonder if things would start to change if everyone were to strive to care more about others than themselves. Even if it only started with one person being selfless. Would this act of kindness carry from one person to the next? I find that it is not easy for someone to be rude to you if you are genuinely kind to them. Sometimes they are still able to be rude, but most of the time, your kindness calms their manner. Maybe that simple act of kindness will brighten their whole day, and in turn, they will end up being kind to other people they see after you... and so on.

This is the question I am asking myself as of late: What kind of difference could I make in people's lives by simply being kind, and thinking of them first, rather than myself?

Cellphone Fever

Today I went to the Cellphone store to look at my options for my coming upgrade. I have always gotten overwhelmed while browsing the cellphones on display, but it seemed to be worse this time. I noticed that there once was a time when they had a cellphone designed to fit just about any personality. But now it seems they all have one purpose in mind... to be the best selling. I also noticed that while they all seem to be competing with each other, they have also taken on a new appearance. The new fangled "outfits" these phones are wearing no longer appeal to individuals. They instead look like a row of drones. All created for one purpose, all doing the same thing, all looking exactly the same. So how is someone like me, who seeks creativity supposed to pick a new phone when they all appear to be the exact same? I have not quite figured out the answer to this question. However, there is a part of me that wishes I could just go back to the day when things were more simple. All you needed was a call button and an end button. I have a feeling this is not going to happen. Although, I wouldn't mind trying to simplify things.

Shopping for Weight Gain

I did not realize how quickly clothes can become too small when you are growing a human being inside of you. It is a very depressing thought to need to go shopping for LARGER clothes because the ones you have are much too small. Normally, clothes shopping sounds like a great time of fun, but not today. Not when I have to move to a different section of the store, one in which I have not yet navigated...
Nevertheless, I am about to head out on a small scale shopping spree (VERY small scale) to purchase clothing that will help me not feel so much like the beached whale that I feel like.

Couponing: Round 2 for the day = Improvement!

So, as some of you may have read, earlier this morning I had my first couponing outing at Publix, and did decently well for my first time. However, I was not fully satisfied with my outcome. I was happy, yes, but not fully satisfied. I felt I could do better... and I DID!

First of all, everyone needs to go to CVS and get an "extra care" card. It's sort of like getting free money. That's the only way I know how to explain it.

With my ECB card (extra care bucks card) I started out saving a little on two bottles of Nivea body wash, and a gallon of milk.
Nivea (with card) was $3.88 per bottle.
The milk was $3.19

I had (2) $3.00 coupons for Nivea Body wash
OOP: 2.35 for (2) Nivea Bodywash, after tax. ($1.16 each after tax)

I had (1) $1.00 coupon for the milk.
OOP: $1.19 (I am assuming the rest of the money deducted from the price of the milk came from the ECB card.... but the receipt is confusing to me, and I can't figure it out.)

At Publix I bought (2) 4-packs of YoPlus Yogurt $2.00 each.
Publix already had them on sale, BOGO
I then used (2) $1.00 coupons, (1) toward each 4-pack and VIOLA!
OOP: FREE!!!

Grocery List:
1 Gallon of Milk
2 Nivea Body Wash 16.9oz
2 4-pack YoPlus Yogurt
Total: $3.54

First "Extreme" Coupon Experience

Today I made my first attempt at Extreme Couponing! I will have to say, I will need a lot of practice! I did not do as well as I had hoped, but I did do well enough to keep me motivated!

Yesterday I went and bought TWO Sunday papers, took out all the coupons, and put them into three main categories: "Health & Beauty," "Paper Goods & Household," and "Food & Dog." According to what I have heard, I need to wait about five weeks before I touch the coupons, BUT I got a little excited and tried to find a couple of deals to start me off.

I started with two items from Publix.
Ritz Crackerfuls
Publix had them on sale BOGO
I then added (2) Manufacturer coupons each for $1 off. I was able to apply one coupon for each box. Lucky for me, the second box was already free, making the second coupon go towards the price of the first box!
Retail: (2) Crackerfuls = $3.49 ea. ($6.98)
Publix Promotion: BOGO = (2) Crackerfuls @ $3.49
(2) MFR Coupons, $1 off ea. = $2 off total
Out of Pocket (OOP): $1.49 for (2) Crackerfuls = $0.75 ea.

Same process for Orville Redenbocker Popcorn
(2) Orville Redenbocker =$9.78
Publix Promotion: BOGO. Leaving total @ (2) Orville Redenbocker for $4.89
(2) MFR Coupons, ea. coupon for $0.55 off one box. =$1.10 off total
OOP: $3.79 for (2) Orville Redenbocker = $1.90 ea.

Total OOP spent: $5.28
Total savings: $11.48 !!

Sorry if that was confusing, but basically the crackers and the popcorn were already Buy One Get One (BOGO), and I had one coupon per item purchased (totaling 4 coupons), meaning I was putting TWO coupons towards ONE item, since the second item is already free. Meaning, more savings for me!!

Until next time! Happy Saving! :)

Becoming a Coupon Queen

While enjoying a visit from my in-laws, I was having a conversation with Ryan's mom about couponing. I informed her that any time I have ever tried to use coupon's in the past, the store brand is always cheaper than the name brand item even with the coupon.
She was telling me that doing couponing that way will not save you money at all. If you coupon correctly, you can get a lot of items for a lot less than the originally price, if not free, and OCCASIONALLY even make money off and item. Although, some stores will not pay you the owed money, they will just leave your balance at zero. But STILL, ZERO dollars for a cart full of groceries is AWESOME!

Here are a few tips to help you in being a beginner couponer.
1)Go to southernsavers.com AND/OR the krazycouponlady.com
2)Read everything you can on the basics to becoming a couponer.
3)Don't try to become and EXTREME couponer to start with, start with ONE STORE to do all your couponing at.
4)Chose a store that seems more expensive the rest of the time, rather than a store that seems cheaper all of the time. (Publix, Kroger, Sweetbay, etc. are good choices.)
5)Get into the habit of picking up MORE THAN ONE paper with coupons, or coupon catalogue.


Feel free to join me on this new adventure! Also, don't hesitate to comment on any frustrations, or tips!

How Dare I?

There is something truly painful about feeling like you have developed a deadly disease in which people wish not to speak to you, nor look at you, nor acknowledge your existence. I can't say I know what a leper feels like, but I can say I know what it feels like to feel disowned. I know what it feels like to be treated like I don't exist. I know what it feels like to have people who you were once close to treat you as though you have never met, and they do not desire to speak to you or know you. Is this what a homeless person standing on the street corner feels like? Do they feel invisible to the world? Do they feel as though death is radiating from their skin, and everyone passing by is too afraid of catching death to even glance in their direction? Do they feel as though their voice is unheard when they speak out loud in a crowd of people?
I do not wish to say I know how someone else feels, but I wish to say I know similar feelings, if not quite to that degree. And I started out writing this blog to help release the feelings of hurt in my heart from all these emotions... and yet, here I am, realizing I have no right to complain. I have no right to feel sorry for myself. I am disgusted with myself even, for ever having treated someone in such ways as I have just described. My heart is broken for the many people I have walked by without a second glance as though they were not even there. I am ashamed of the many people standing on the corner asking for food that I came upon and chose to look the other way. What have I become? What have WE become? We are such a hateful, selfish world. My heart is broken because of the person I have been. How dare I stand before THE GOD who created everything and everyone and tell him I just didn't feel like giving away twenty dollars to someone who may not have had a warm meal that night, or a warm bed. How dare I ask God for more when I can't even share what He has already given me? How dare I ask God to mend my heart, when I can't even remember to ask Him to mend people's souls? How dare I ask God to help me to have a good day, when I haven't ask Him to use me to save a dying world? How dare I ask God to bless my food, when I am too greedy and stingy to share it with a hungry man living under the bridge?
My heart is broken for the things I done, or HAVEN'T done.... but I feel Christ stirring me to be better. I feel Him molding me to look more like Him. It is a painful, sad, and yet beautiful process. I pray that He never stops molding me into what He wants me to be.